Leaving: A (very) Unfinished Stage Play

For AroWriMo 2021. The theme for script/play was humanity. 

Content Notes: Depression, manipulation, unhealthy romantic relationship, processing self-blame


Title: Leaving

A fractured personal narrative on entering and leaving an unhealthy relationship and the pain of being aromantic without that knowledge.

Cast of Characters

BUG:                        Teen. Female. Two braids. Dressed to go out and be active.

LILY:                        Early-mid 20's. Female. Long messy hair, unstyled. Loose clothes. No shoes.

NARRATOR:           Late 20's. Female. Dressed in layers. Short hair (or hidden under a hat). 

HIM:                        Male. Early-mid 20's.  

Scene

An abstract space that layers different times and settings. 

Time

The past (BUG) and the future (NARRATOR) are commenting on the feelings and decisions of the present (LILY) as time progresses toward her leaving a person (HIM) she does not romantically love. 



ACT I

Scene 1

SETTING:               A simple chair is center stage, facing forward. Upstage there is a projector screen with nothing displayed on it. 

AT RISE:                 NARRATOR is standing downstage to one side.


NARRATOR

When I was young, I loved to snuggle up with my family. They called me love bug, and the nickname Bug stuck. 

   (Enter BUG, who runs and jumps in a wide circle around the chair.)

NARRATOR (Cont.) 
I loved the way a bug was meant to be out running around in nature, and a bug did bug people - 

(BUG approaches the NARRATOR as though to try and start a conversation, but NARRATOR shoos BUG away. BUG goes on happily running around the stage.)

NARRATOR (Cont.)
But that was in it's nature so that was alright. 

(BUG lies down on her stomach, propped up on her elbows, and reading a colorful book.) 

NARRATOR (Cont.)
When I moved out, I remade myself and affirmed the change by going by a different name. I wanted to be someone else, someone right, who fit - who didn't hurt for not fitting. 

                    (Enter LILY, trips over and points for BUG to move downstage, sits on chair center stage, good posture.)

NARRATOR (Cont.)
The plan was unattainable, but the name change stuck. 

(LILY flinches, then takes on a more exaggerated good posture.)




Excerpt from a Scene toward the beginning

NARRATOR
It was a lovely date. She liked that he convinced her to complain that her drink tasted terrible. She liked how easily they talked. As they stood outside the coffee shop, he asked -

HIM
(nervously)
So, do you want to do this again?

NARRATOR
The question should have been expected, and yet Lily was caught off guard. An unplanned rejection tumbled from her lips.

LILY
I don't think I'm straight ... or gay.

NARRATOR
Lily didn't know what she was saying. The words didn't make sense. She hadn't planned them. She had no concept for not wanting. She didn't want to hurt his feelings. She didn't have a reason for not wanting him.

 (Quick fade to black and back)

HIM
This week of friendship has been amazing. We should date.

LILY
What? No.

NARRATOR
Lily, reasonable, wondered if they'd be able to stay friends when it seemed his interest in dating persisted. Lily, the fool, forgot.

(Quick fade to black and back)

HIM
It's been a year. I love you. I can't stop loving you. I can't bear to be your friend any longer if you won't date me.

LILY
(small, quiet)
Okay.

NARRATOR
I ask that you forgive Lily for this. After graduating, she was cut off from structure and familiarity and social support systems. She felt purposeless, empty, and lost. She was desperate for change. She was convinced there was something wrong with her. She told herself he was an adult with agency and he knew how she felt (or didn't feel). Guilt ate at her, but the desperation to stop hurting, to let someone try and fix her won out. 

LILY
(to NARRATOR)
Wait, maybe I shouldn't do this.

NARRATOR
But then he was there. He knew the bus you'd be riding home from work. He followed you home and stayed as long as you let him. He made a game of seeing you every day, a game of intimacy. 

NARRATOR (Cont.)
In your loneliness, you drank up his affection. You started to enjoy the game. You felt happy, and mistook this for love.

LILY
I love you.

NARRATOR
But really, you loved how he made you feel.

  




Excerpt from a Scene toward the middle

HIM
I knew I loved you enough, but I didn't know you loved me enough to stay.

NARRATOR
And in the moment, Lily thought "Wait, I could have left?" but the thought drifted away.




Except from a Scene toward the end

(LILY lies unmoving centerstage.)

NARRATOR
It's time to go now. Get up. 
(LILY doesn't move. NARRATOR crosses into center stage for the first time and grabs LILY's arm.)
Get up!

(BUG pushes the NARRATOR away from LILY)

BUG
No! She has to stay. It's our fault he's so upset. He needs us. We're an emotionless monster. It's not possible for us to burnout emotionally. We have to stay here and let him drain us, because it doesn't hurt.

(LILY sits up on the groun)

LILY
Please. I can't do this anymore. I can't leave while you need me. Please. I'm sorry that I need this from you. But, please. Can you let me go?

HIM
(off)
Okay. (exhales loudly). I can let you go.

LILY
Thank you.

HIM
(off, while sobbing)
Wait. I thought that was a test. I thought if I let you go, you'd stay.

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