Wonderland: Aro Tunes Thursday
Happy Aro Tunes Thursday! A weekly call on Aggresively Arospec's Tumbr for songs that "make you feel proudy arospec" or "you feel like claiming for the community for no particular reason."
The original intention of Aro Tunes Thursday is to submit songs to Aggresively Arospec and see all the songs others submitted, but I like having the space to dig deeper.
"I'm not Snow White, but I'm lost inside this forest.
I'm not Red Riding Hood, but I think the wolves have got me.
Don't want your stilettos. I'm not not Cinderella."
I'm absolutely reading into this (it's what I do) but to me this is about those who are not fairy tale characters can still have some of the experiences of fairy tale characters. Therefor, those who are not romantic (whether aromantic or not that into romance) can still have some of the same experiences as romantics.
I find it curious that of the four references to specific fairy tale stories (Beauty and the Beast comes later) Red Riding Hood is included despite this story not having a romance. It could just be that the red hood and the wolves are strong images. It could be that the singer sees fairy tale expectations as touching more than romance.
"I don't need a knight so baby take off all your armor."
I read "armor" as the expectations for what a man in a romantic relationship is meant to act like. The singer is asking them to take off their armor, and to be themself instead.
"You be the Beast and I'll be the Beauty Beauty."
This makes me think of assigning roles or playing house. Romance can carry with it the expectation of two set roles.
"Who needs true love as long as you love me truly?"
I love this line. I read "true love" as romantic destined instaneous love and "love me truly" as the commitment and trust of any caring relationship.
"I want it all, but I want you more."
I don't relate to this line. 🙂
"Will you wake me up, boy, if I bite your poison apple?"
I like this line a lot. I read it as "If I agree to be in a romantic relationships with you, I'm expecting that you will wake up romantic feelings in me." The poison apple here meaning entering a relationship for unhealthy reasons / with unhealthy expectations.
"I don't believe in fairy tales (no no no)"
I had a lot written for this section, but I've decided to save "amatonormativity as fairy tale" for it's own post.
Instead of reading "you and me" as a romantic pairing, I'm choosing to read it as all you aros and me. So then it becomes about believing in the aro community and validating our experiences and feelings.
"Take me to Wonderland."
I interpret Wonderland as the promised highest happiness that is *supposed* to happen in romantic relationships.
"When I lay my head down and go to sleep at night,
my dreams consist of things that'll make you wanna hide."
I don't relate to this line. ... Unless I twist the meaning a bit! My dream for happiness outside of romance is something that others may perceive as sad and may ignore.
"Don't lock me in your tower, show me your magic powers.
I'm not afraid to face a little bit of danger danger."
Here the "tower" could be read as expectations, "magic powers" as my assumption that the romantic partner will be able to draw out my romantic feelings once we're in a relationship, and "danger" being the emotional fall out. I relate to "a little bit of danger" because I underestimated the potential emotional fall out.
This interpretation puts "not afraid" in an interesting position. "Not afraid" has a positive and brave connotation. But in my case the lack of fear was through a lack of self-comprehension and a lack of understanding the realness and depth of romance for the people who wanted to date me.
"I want the love, the money, and the perfect ending."
As with "wonderland," I am reading "love" and "perfect ending" as the highest happiness promised by amatonormativity.
"You want the same as I, I, so stop pretending."
I find this line fascinatingly haunting. It could be read as the amatonormative assumption that everyone wants romantic love, and those who think they don't are pretending/confused. It could also be read specifically with the one-on-one context of I have romantic feelings for you, therefor you must have romantic feelings for me, and if you think you don't it's because you are pretending/confused.
"I want to show you how, ah, good could be together.
I want to love you through the night I'll be your sweet disaster."
I don't relate to these lines, but "I'll be your sweet disaster" gets me thinking. "I'll be" means that there is knowledge ahead of that there will be disaster. That the singer is choosing to go into the relationship with the justification that the disaster will be "sweet."
I never entered romantic relationships with an "I'll be your sweet disaster" attitude. Which makes me think of ethics. And I'll have to save theorizing about "the ethics of agreeing to my past romantic relationships from before I knew I was aro" for another blog post.
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