Mad at Disney: Aro Tunes Thursday

Happy Aro Tunes Thursday! A weekly call on Aggresively Arospec's Tumbr for songs that "make you feel proudy arospec" or "you feel like claiming for the community for no particular reason."

The original intention of Aro Tunes Thursday is to submit songs to Aggresively Arospec and see all the songs others submitted, but I like having the space to dig deeper. 

[Video of "Mad at Disney." salem ilese wears a rapunzel length long braid and big ears.]

I wasn't the first person to think of "Mad at Disney" by salem ilese for Aro Tunes Thursday. 

"I'm mad at Disney, Disney
They tricked me, tricked me
Had me wishing on a shooting star
But now I'm twenty something
I still know nothing
'Bout who I am or what I'm not"

This stanza made me think about how amatonormativity hurts more than aces and aros. Maybe being aroace is a smaller factor toward spending much of my twenty-somethings not knowing what I wanted. Instead, maybe the way amatonormativity presents the "one way" messes with most people's heads.

"So call me a pessimist
But I don't believe in it
Finding a true love's kiss is bullshit"

This is a fun stanza. This made me think about how I often give a disclaimer of "I know I'll sound like a cynic, but ...". This ties into how not believing in love / not wanting romantic love is assumed to be a sad and cold-hearted attitude. 

"I felt hurt love
By the word love"

I like this line because I blame my hurt on the concept and expection of romantic love, not on the relationships that failed. In the annotated lyrics, salem ilese said this was a reference to her song Bad Word, which I'll have to delve into on a future Aro Tunes Thursday. 

"What the hell is love supposed to feel like?
What the hell is love?"

In the annotated lyrics, salem ilese said "Love feels like everything. I don’t think it’s a feeling, but rather all of them combined. I’m not sure I’ll ever really know the answer to this question." 

I have felt frustrated at times that explanations of what sexual or romantic attraction feels like are often "you just know," or so vague it accidentally includes endspec experiences, or only includes one interpretation and frames it as the "one way."

Oops, I slipped into a mini-vent there 😳

The point I mean to be making is that attraction isn't easy for anyone to pin down. It's not like alloros and allosexes are up in their towers cackling that they've successfully confused the aros and aces. Everyone is confused and trying to piece it together in a way that works for them. 

"I'm mad at Disney, Disney
They tricked me, tricked me
No more wishing on a shooting star"

The outro flips the sentiment of the intro from "had me wishing on a shooting star" to "no more wishing on a shooting star." I connected this to the positive growth I've had from expecting a romantic happy ending to letting go and looking to other ways to be happy.

Other Notes
In a video interview about the song, she calls herself "anti-romantic."

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

September TAAAP Chat Notes - Aplatonicism

Disclaimers "This is a scattered bunch of thoughts and notes on some of the things that were discussed about activism in the September TAAAP Pride Chats .  There’s no solid thesis here, but maybe a few conversation starters. Some of what’s here is a post-chat thought and wasn’t even discussed at all.  This should also be taken as incomplete and not a full overview of what was discussed.  (Notably, it doesn’t include much of what went on in the voice chats.)" - explanation copied from redbeardace's Chat Notes. See end of post for links.  There is no ONE WAY to be aplatonic.  Prompts 1. What kind of aplatonic resources are there or should there be? 2. How do you respond to platonic "I love you"s? 3. How do you define platonic attraction? 4. If you're aplatonic, do you consider it a major part of your identity? Have you ever come out as aplatonic? 5. If you experience other attractions, how does your platonic attraction or your aplatonicism interact with the
Read more

Call for Submissions January 2021: Stories

It's time for the  Carnival of Aros ! 🎊 The Theme: Stories Life is full of stories: the ones we tell ourselves, the ones we tell others, and the ones we are told. Stories shape perception, expectation, and the fabric of reality. Okay, I'm getting grandiose - the point is I love stories. I love stories so much I would rather talk about how they work than write them or read them 😂 . (I'm working on that.) What is a story you want to tell? What is a story you no longer believe? What is a story you feel is harmful? What kind of story do you want to see? Take this theme anywhere you want to go. Tell a story, real or fictional. Complain about a story, or a recurring theme in stories. Analyze the story line of a movie or fanfic or a podcast. Create an adoptable character sketch for another writer to use. How to Participate Write a blog post  (or any public digital content I can link to) related to the theme. Share the link  in the comments or email me at charcharcharace@gmail.co
Read more

Taking Space from Toxic Ace Spaces

Carnival of Aces: February 2021 When I saw the prompt “comparing ace spaces,” I winced. There’s an issue I’ve been wanting to discuss (and this is the perfect prompt for it), but I'm worried saying anything will invite drama. I’m not a fan of drama. So, I will refrain from giving specifics about incidents and spaces, and I ask you, dear reader, to not comment your guesses. The issue is – I feel some ace spaces are toxic. And I don't mean toxic for everyone. Some spaces can be unhealthy, unwelcoming, or uncomfortable for certain people or certain identities to be in.  I’m not here to call out specific spaces. I shared with friends why I was anxious to write this blog post. The recurring response was that this was an important topic that needs to be written about. (This did not reduce my anxiety 😑 ) As a self-compromise, I thought I would broadly list issues that I have experienced or that others have told me about. minimized or ignored discrimination/bias: racism, ableis
Read more